REVIEW: SPLATTER BEACH

Twin brothers Mark and John Polonia have proven themselves several times over since 1987's SPLATTER FARM as masters of ultra low-budget monster moviemaking in its 100% purest form, and their latest SPLATTER BEACH proves they are still no couple of slouches when it comes to flat-out fun schlock entertainment. Camp Motion Pictures, up to this point known for restoring and rereleasing 1980s video gorefests on DVD chose the Polonias as directors of its first in-house production. With the assistance of Pop Cinema (formerly EI Cinema) alumnus Misty "Erin Brown" Mundae and Erika Smith (SEXY ADVENTURES OF VAN HELSING) along with cameraman (and monster film maker himself) Brett Piper, the brothers have created their own cheap modern homage to cheap bikini creature features of the atomic age. Sexy girls on the beach? Check! Tireless reporter whom no one believes? Check! Guy in a green monster suit? Check! Light on bloody special fx but heavy on b-movie cheese, SPLATTER BEACH only comes up short living up to its title. But that in itself is a hallmark of old-school low-budget horror, is it not? Erika Smith is once again outstanding, making a throwaway bimbo role her own as she plays it like she walked right out of a 1960's drive-in movie, and the bizarre Ken Van Sant is a riot as a ridiculously homophobic bodybuilder.

The highlight of this DVD is a well-produced career retrospective on the Polonia Brothers that features photos of the boys with their very first cameras as they chronicle their life of b-filmmaking via detailed interviews. This is great stuff not only for fans of these guys but for anyone who wants to make their own movies, or anyone who ever tried. Their passion is obvious, their enthusiasm is boundless, and their dedication is seemingly eternal. With this release, you get a real sense of Mark and John Polonia getting their due for all their years of hard work.